(no subject)

[evowhisperer]

(Let's just start with this post and have new threads for each scene, shall we?)

Comments

3/3

[evowhisperer]

Through his pain, Cesar notices a strange sense of connection to his other self. Both of them feel the same sorrow. Both of their voices are low and subdued, and both of them are carrying the same memories, even with the slight time differences between them. Ordinarily, Cesar holds onto his grief as though locking up a monster inside a little cage, knowing it would leap up and overwhelm him if it ever saw the light of day. This Caesar isn't someone who would release it by accident or on purpose: he has has his own dark little corner with its own cage, and for now, they can both simply stand in those shadows, not facing but sharing in their loss.

It's strange, Cesar realizes, but not altogether unwelcome.

Re: 3/3

[pineapplesalmon]

Caesar doesn't notice the mild tone, and even if he had, everything else has gone out of his mind as he thinks about their parents. Their parents. Parents that Rex doesn't remember. Even if Caesar has gotten closer to Rex in Nautilus, there was still some part of him that felt alone. Rex couldn't share in his grief. No one could share in his grief but himself. He was both simulataneously Rex's older brother and a single child. Rex didn't remember their lives as a family; Caesar did. How could Rex grieve for those he didn't even remember?

He wasn't good at emotions and couldn't express them. There was no one to talk to about how he missed his parents, so he talked to no one and ignored the pain as best as he could. Sometimes--sometimes though, it had nearly overwhelmed him.

Rex still had no idea how hard Christmas had been. At least Rex had been there. Caesar had no idea what would've happened if he had been by himself. He never even let his mind wander down that "what if" path. Rex had been there, so there hadn't been a reason to worry or even think about it.

He looks back at Cesar then, his eyes widening slightly as their eyes meet. Cesar doesn't need to say a word for Caesar to know that he understands in the same way that Caesar does. That their pain is shared now. Maybe they can't talk about it together, but just to be in the presence of someone who understands is more than what he had before. So much more. Even moreso because this other man standing in front of him feels the exact same pain.

Caesar swallows, unable to speak, and his chest still aches, but he closes the distance between them and places his hand on Cesar's shoulder, a touch of comfort for his other self. Something he had wanted himself but couldn't find. There had simply been no one that he could even remotely consider speaking to about this.

Until now. And not yet, not for a while. But... perhaps someday.

[evowhisperer]

Someday, perhaps, but certainly not now.

Cesar accepts the comfort wordlessly, and after a few seconds puts his other side's hand on his copy's other shoulder. They're a mirror image of the other.

The moment holds, precious and supportive--and then, all too soon, breaks.

Cesar lowers his arm, and reaches down to pick up his discarded clothes, taking himself out of reach at the same time. He doesn't know what to feel or do right now, and the first thing he can think of is to fall back to what he's done before: withdraw. Caesar had his brother, however oblivious and inept he was at helping him cope. Cesar had cold hallways and an empty laboratory. Solitude has been all he's had for a long time, and part of him is certain that this other Caesar wants the same thing, at least on some level. How else would either of them find the time to collect themselves, and push the grief back further? It's composure that he wants, and all it takes is a bit of distance to get it.

When Cesar straightens up, he has the wet clothes balled up in his arms.

"Where should I put these?"

His voice sounds almost normal again: quiet, but unaffected.

[pineapplesalmon]

He's almost disappointed when the other pulls away. Almost. He's not ready to talk about it, to even.. really think about it for more than a few snatches of moments at a time. He's not ready, and has no idea he's closer to being ready than the other. Nearly losing Rex to being Heartless had started him on the path of grief, even if he had pulled back and shoved it all back inside when Rex had returned to normal.

It was only a matter of time. Nautilus had a way of changing people. It was, after all, called the "City of Change". Caesar didn't know that it was slowly changing him.

"We can hang them in the bathroom to dry," Caesar replied, his voice even and also quiet as he went to get his own clothes. "And then maybe.. I'll make us something to eat?"

It was a bit of a tentative question, but Caesar wasn't sure if his double was still hungry. He himself was less hungry now than he was before, considering their conversation, but food would give them something to do. Better than silence.

[evowhisperer]

"Good idea," Cesar replies, moving to wait by the room's door. There's no hesitance in his tone, and he sounds completely recovered. If he continues at this rate, then perhaps a late meal won't taste completely like sand by the time it's ready.

"Do you need any help with the food?"

[pineapplesalmon]

Caesar shrugged, walking towards the other and out the door, then down the hall. "Not really, but you should pick out what you want. I don't really feel like Bending right now." For reasons they both knew. "So I was thinking some instant udon or ramen."

He'd be normal in no time if he didn't think too much on what they were just talking about. Sure, he had been the one to bring it up, but he still didn't like dwelling on it. He was already starting to think about what type of Udon he wanted as he hung his clothes up over the shower.

"The packaging's in Japanese, but I've picked up enough here that I can read the instructions. At least they know what spicy means."

Because he's tasted what Americans consider spicy. It's... not spicy.

[evowhisperer]

"Udon. And that is very good news."

Cesar follows, and when they reach the bathroom he hangs his clothes on the nearest available surface.

"I'm afraid that even in my own time, Providence's cafeterias are still learning. I've had to buy a bottle of hot sauce for my own personal use."

[pineapplesalmon]

"Tell me about it," Caesar replied, a bit cheered up by their shared pain; the other part was more interesting, however. "So, you're ahead of me, then?"

It really did make sense. Caesar was basically behind everyone else, so a double of himself had more of a chance to be ahead than behind. He had already told his double when he was from, so Cesar would know if he was ahead or behind.

There had been things that had been troubling him. Mostly, those ahead of him seemed to have changed their behavior towards him. Caesar may be obtuse about others' feelings sometimes, but even he could notice obvious signs. Circe was no longer friendly. Holiday was more cautious. Rex had acted... weird. And then there was Sqwydd--Sqwydd had punched him in the face without explanation.

Caesar had a bad feeling about it, and he wasn't sure he really wanted to know why everyone's behavior was changing. It was something that he wasn't sure what he wanted to know, but he couldn't help himself. Caesar already knew that, back home, Rex and him no longer had a bond. He wondered if Cesar knew and understood that. Caesar hadn't until Rex had told him, and that had only been caused by Rex being both Heartless and being affected by the Truth Telling storm.

He was looking at his other self thoughtfully. Caesar had noticed that Cesar's behavior was a bit odd. Perhaps there was a reason behind it...?

[evowhisperer]

"I believe I am," Cesar replies. He turns to face his counterpart, putting a hand to his chin thoughtfully.

"If the last thing you remember from our world is Six losing his memories, then that would put me almost a year ahead of you in time. However, this begs the question of what the ramifications of time travel could be."

"Have you had a chance to observe situations where advanced information from the future causes a time paradox for the people in question? Or does the system of Awakened and Unawakened selves account for this possibility and contain some kinds of safety measures to prevent temporal collapse?"

[pineapplesalmon]

In any other situation, the mirror expressions would've been funny. However, Caesar instead concentrated the answer at hand. He actually knew how to answer it from first hand knowledge.

"I have observed a situation in which future knowledge was known," Caesar stated. "Specifically, Six learned that he was to lose his memories in advance. There was no time paradox created. Instead, he did things here to prepare for his self from six years previous. I believe the system of Awakened and Unawakened selves prevents a time paradox from occurring. Only more powerful Awakened can even try to correct flaws in a world."

He paused for a moment. "I was under the impression that it's standard to compare timelines by the others. 'What's the last thing you remember?' is a typical question for those from the same world."

[evowhisperer]

"Fascinating."

"If you consider that the ramifications of future knowledge are minimal, then this would make sense. With no self-imposed barriers to contend with, information regarding each others' locations in time and current environments would be critical for interpersonal social rituals, such as bonding."

"For example, the mere fact that I know where you are in the time line gives me a general knowledge as to your current activities. You don't seem to know very much about my time, but it should be enough to say that we still work at Providence, and that we've made some progress in continuing our work with nanites."

[pineapplesalmon]

Caesar nodded to his first statement. Yes, it was critical to know when. People didn't like talking about the future to someone in the past. They others seemed particularly cautious about mentioning anything to him, especially Rex. It was a bit disconcerting.

What Cesar said next piqued his interest more than a little. "The others have been hesitant to mention anything about their times to me. I haven't pressed them as to why." He wasn't going to press Cesar, either; it was impolite, and there was a part of him dreading finding out. "I'm still catching up to the last five years in scientific studies on nanites. Now that Moses has been proven mostly a fraud--" Caesar frowned, remembering what he had heard regarding that incident. "--and his machine destroyed, the latest 'breakthrough' seems to be Rex. I thought the science community would be further by now."

He shrugged, crossing his arms and leaning back against the counter. "It's good to hear that we've made some progress."

[evowhisperer]

Cesar can tell that he won't push. He might wait by a metaphorical door, unwillingly available for when the information leaks out sooner or later, but the older Salazar boys have always been aware that there are things in the world they are happier not delving into. Unfortunately, both of them know he can't stay in the dark forever. The past (and future) have a habit of catching up with people, and sometimes it's better to meet them head-on, instead of caught off guard.

Cesar looks to the side, solemnly considering the stairwell leading downstairs. "Our progress has come at a cost. A percentage of this headway was applied to different goals than we'd originally hoped: Rex disappeared for a few months, and Providence had to find alternatives for a cure without him. Fast."

"Not all of these alternatives worked out the way I expected."

[pineapplesalmon]

His eyes locked onto his double. Cesar had his complete attention now--not that he didn't already, but now it was more intense. This was what the others weren't telling him.

Rex disappeared. Only a few months, but still--no. Caesar doesn't want to think about that, so he doesn't. Instead, he focuses on the results. His other self was solemn. It couldn't be good, but... The way Cesar had spoken, he was offering information. Caesar didn't want to know, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized that he had to know.

"What sort of alternatives?" Caesar asked cautiously. "Those ahead of me have been treating me differently. Some of them have become quite cold towards me. I need to know why."

If Rex wasn't going to tell him, then he was just going to have to rely on himself.

[evowhisperer]

"I would imagine that it's because of our most used invention so far, post-disappearance."

"The invention consists of a nanite interface collar that can modify and regulate the activity of nanites inside a given subject, focusing primarily on the endocrine and nervous systems. The purpose of these collars is most often pacifying and subduing a given subject, these namely being EVOs."

[pineapplesalmon]

Caesar doesn't say anything to that immediately, instead considering the implications. The alternative to the cure was a good one. It would cause minimal injuries to everyone involved--both the EVO and the teams capturing it. Except Cesar said that invention would be the reason for the reactions from the others.

"It's a brilliant solution from the theoretical perspective, but its existence doesn't explain the reactions of the others," Caesar replied after a moment. "Two of Rex's friends have been less than happy with my presence since they've returned from home; one even punched me in the face and broke my nose. And Rex...."

Caesar trails off, his eyes widening. Sqwydd had outright punched him in the face, as he had just said. Circe had given him the cold shoulder. Even Rex had acted weird around him for a while. All three of them were EVOs. It's only these reactions that allow Caesar to put two and two together. Something he never would have realized by just hearing about the invention itself.

The scientist looked mildly alarmed, his voice raising higher, "Is it being used against all EVOs?"

[evowhisperer]

Cesar's face might as well have been chiseled from stone. He tilts his head forward in a half-nod, but doesn't let the motion break his eye contact with his counterpart.

"I'm afraid that it is."

[pineapplesalmon]

Caesar's mouth slowly drops open. He hasn't had the six months of separation of Rex, and hasn't been working under Black Knight. Providence wasn't yet a toxic environment full of EVO hatred. And there is no reason for him to control his emotions so completely here.

His heart is sinking. Using it against sentient EVOs makes sense if only to transport them after they've been belligerent, and only under special circumstances at that. But Circe and Sqwydd didn't seem like the types to attack people. Well, besides that one punch, but if what Cesar was saying was indeed correct, it was understandable.

"How bad is it?"

[evowhisperer]

"Very bad."

"Prejudice against EVOs is at an all time high. After Rex was gone, Providence's 'Cure, Contain, or Kill' policy was shortened to only have 'Contain or Kill'. Violence was breaking out all over the world. For a while it seemed that an all-out war between EVOs and non-EVOs was imminent."

"The collars were the only measures strong enough to pacify everyone higher up enough to give non-violent measures another chance."

[pineapplesalmon]

Caesar closes his eyes against the knowledge. There had been no choice, then. Rex had told him that there was prejudice against EVOs, but he had been a fool and had been completely unaware of it. Even when he went home once and returned, he was still unaware. With the world sent into a panic with Rex gone, he'd have to learn about it very, very fast.

"It's better than everyone dying," Caesar opened his eyes and looked at him. "The alternative had to be quick. But it's not a permanent solution. A temporary one at best, especially if it's being used improperly like I suspect."

He looked away, visibly disturbed. "One of Rex's friends came back muzzled, like she was a dog."

[evowhisperer]

He hadn't known. For just a moment, disgust, mingled with something else--guilt? Deep guilt?--leaks through. There's plenty more where that came from, but this is his burden to bear. The expression is gone soon enough, buried under a solemn, resolute frown that's carved into his face in a way that previous stone mask hadn't been.

"... I see." It's very telling that even in the surprise of the moment, Cesar can't find it in himself to disbelieve it.

"In time, I hope that this solution becomes not just temporary, but obsolete. If we can find a cure to EVOs everywhere, then the collars would theoretically be decommissioned as soon as possible. With Providence's resources, even if the Consortium disagrees, we should be able to find some way to make it work."

[pineapplesalmon]

He saw the expression, even if out of the corner of his eye. He doesn't speak, for there really.. isn't much he wants to say on the subject. Caesar doesn't even want to really think deeply about the subject. It's too disturbing. Instead, he focuses on that ray of hope that--

"--Consortium?!" Caesar's head whips back around to stare at his double; he quickly forces the panic out of his voice and tries to speak more evenly. "What does the Consortium have to do with Providence?"

He already knew with those words: they had to be funding Providence.

[evowhisperer]

"They have everything to do with Providence," Cesar replies. If his counterpart hadn't been sure yet, he can be, now.

"One of the things my research uncovered during Rex's absence was the source of Providence's extensive funding. It came up after a rather destructive coup--White Knight is gone, and Black Knight is his replacement."

[pineapplesalmon]

He had only briefly wondered in his current time where the funding was coming from. Perhaps he should have dug a bit deeper. Still, even if it is the Consortium funding them... it is funding that's necessary. As much as he hates to admit it.

Black Knight only makes the situation worse. Caesar's face is grim.

"It's no wonder why no one would tell me these things. Not even Rex."

[evowhisperer]

"It's possible that no one knew where to start," Cesar offers unhelpfully. He might try to soften the blows as they come, except that in the end there's really no way around the fact that Cesar's arrival comes with a lot of bad news.

It'll be alright--this is himself, they're talking about. They're one and the same, and if Cesar could take dealing with all of this on his own, then even if it is all at once, Caesar will probably be fine. Of course, being 'fine' isn't the same as being happy about it...